Thursday, December 15, 2005

Withdrawal Symptoms

My departure from Japan is fast approaching, and along with it a great sorrow and moments of contemplation also come. It is now about 1 month until I board the Airplane and everyday is very busy due to life, but it is in those quiet moments like when I am studying or even when I am sleeping that a voice in the back of my head says “Do I really have to leave?”.

It was about 1 week ago that it dawned on me that I would soon be leaving. The feeling of leaving is very surreal, leaving is not a one day process but a series of events- packing your life into boxes, farewell parties, looking back over your accomplishments and failures, new resolutions, saying goodbye to the people who have come to be your closest friends, and finally leaving your life as you know it behind and starting all over again.
I am sure many Ex-pats can agree with me when I say daily routine is one of our biggest securities in this life and when it is abandoned many people become lost and confused about what to do with their lives.

While I have only been in Japan for 10 months, I have come to establish myself quite well here; if you gave me a job I would have no problem supporting myself in this country. I have made many incredible friends from all over the world thanks to being apart of an Exchange organization and also due to attending the International Baptist Church in Fukuoka. I know that many of these people will be my friends for life and I will have a friend (or 5) in many countries I visit in the future. I am definitely going to miss my weekly trips to Fukuoka city, while Sydney may be my home city (and I love it), Fukuoka has become my second home city and there are so many elements Sydney just can’t compare to.

Dwelling on these thoughts and feelings and letting them dominate the rest of my stay I exactly what I intend not to do. I always knew this time would come, it is a part of the Exchange journey. Instead I plan to continue doing what I have always done, get back up and keep on running- focus on the future. By no means does this mean that I am trying to make myself emotionally void, that would be unhealthy and demeaning. What I am doing is prioritizing the focuses in my life and making sure that my time in Japan is well spent. Japan is only a small part of the bigger picture, what I would call the launching pad for the bigger achievements I plan to accomplish and the better things that are to come in the future. While I may have a firm focus on the future, I always remember this quote from the movie Ferris Beullers day off “ If you don’t stop once in a while to take a look around at the scenery, life will pass you right by”.
Focus on the future but never forget to enjoy the place you are currently at.

Keep rocking,

Jieshi